How to Build a ROCKET BARREL with DIRTY TWIN

Since I've moved into the new place over on the West side of Town, I've been attempting to reclaim my small slice of Heaven from the throws of nature.  Tremendous amounts of leaves, branches and tree carcasses have piled up in this back yard over the years.  Recently, my buddies Dirty Twin and Big Al dropped by for a visit, some drinks and to make a Burn Barrel to help facilitate uncovering the lawn beneath my graveyard of wood.  Here's how it's done Durrrrrrrrdy South Style...

STEP ONE:  Procure One Large Barrel (Thanks to Dirty Twin's equally devious other half, Jacobi Christ.)

STEP TWO:  Cut the Top Off of that Bitch

STEP THREE:  Rage

STEP FOUR:  Watch the Fireworks

STEP FIVE:  Keep Cutting That Bitch

STEP SIX:  Cut a Door Near the Bottom for Air Flow and Coal Removal

STEP SEVEN:  Mark Rebar for Trimming and Insertion

STEP EIGHT:  Drill a Pattern of Holes Around that Bitch

STEP NINE:  Criss Cross Rebar through Holes to Create a Grid Pattern

STEP TEN:  Test Flammability of Any Remaining Residue Inside the Mystery Barrel from the Body Shop with a Newport

STEP ELEVEN:  Fill that Bitch Up with Shit to Burn

STEP TWELVE:  Burn Motherfucker Burn